How big is "Big Data" really? The definition has changed drastically over time. In this talk, {speaker} recounts building his own database on top of Postgres to replace a legacy HBase/OpenTSDB cluster. While once considered "Big Data", the real-time monitoring system's inflow can now be called moderate data at best. Immerse yourself in the dessicated technicalities of Timescale and partitioned Postgres tables, let the repressed memories of running a Hadoop cluster bubble back up to the surface, learn just how many rows per second you can firehose into a standard GP3 volume, and why you might not need (or want) horizontal scaling after all.