Everyone loves to talk themselves up in conference presentations, regaling you with tales of their technical brilliance. Sure these talks can be filled with valuable information about the latest technologies, but have you ever stopped to consider how it makes you, the audience, feel? After you've spent the weekend hearing about reactively programmed event sourced games running in the cloud isn't hard to go back to writing CRUD forms using ASP.NET WebForms 3.5 against an Access DB? Don't you want someone to stand up and tell you all the ways they've screwed up so you can feel better about the code that awaits you on Monday? This is that talk. It's taken Colin 17 years to learn these things through failures big and small. Now you can learn such classic mistakes as inappropriate layering, leaky abstractions, reimplementing perfectly valid frameworks because reasons, undervaluing the cost of development friction, and so much more. All this (probably, maybe) in just one session the length of which I did not bother to research. Yours to take away so you can laugh smugly at me when you fail to do so in your career*. Vote now but don't send any money. *offer void where prohibited